1 week after surgery and I can physically see a difference in my body. The weather was beautiful and I was feeling well enough to actually get out of bed. Plus the boredom of laying in bed 24/7 with only a TV to keep me occupied got boring really fast. I put on my bathing suit and did some sunbathing on my deck. Took a picture to log my journey. 1 month post op and physically life is back to normal. I am working full time, being a mom and a wife. Food wise is a whole other story. I'm going to be honest here....I kinda despised my husband.....a lot. My husband had been super supportive with my decision to have this surgery but when it came to the after care part the first 3 months were hard. Having surgery physically shrunk my stomach but it didn't take away my cravins, sense of smell or taste. I wanted that piece of pizza, I wanted that candy, chocolate, burger. I WANTED what he was eating!! Mcdonalds, dairy queen...bringing that home while I sip my chicken broth and protein shakes was TORTURE!! Sitting in bed one night watching TV he is mowing down on gummy candies then leans over and kisses me so I can taste it.....I ended up in tears. I told him it wasn't fair that he got to eat all this good food and I was stuck with my chicken broth and will probably never have a candy again as long as I live (yes I can still have candy..just in moderation). I actually started to regret my decision of surgery because my food addiction was taking over. This struggle with food and him happened for awhile. I tried to be nice and talk gently to let him know what a struggle this was for me. He basically said it was his life and he was going to do what he wanted and no one could tell him what to eat and what not to eat. Fair enough...he is an adult and if he wants to eat crap food that is his choice. Comprimise!! Marriage is all about comprimise right? I don't care what he eats/drinks as long as it isn't around me. I want to take control of my health and if he wants to eat crap food that was his problem. After he went to Dairy Queen 3 days in a row with our daughter...that was the straw that broke the camels back. I wouldn't say I went nuts on him but definitely gave him a piece of my mind. No more playing this nice game. I realized if I was going to succeed with my tool(gastric bypass) that my whole household needed to be on board. He was over weight himself and unhealthy...maybe this is something we could do together?? I think when he saw how hard this was for me, he finally decdided to make a lifstyle change with me. Once I got over the food hurdle the weight just started melting off. At the 3 week mark I stalled for 6 weeks but then the weight just dropped. I had more energy, I wasn't embarrassed to go out in public, people were really noticing the difference in my size now. With my food addiction I definitely tested my limits. Burgers are a no go...puking....deep fried foods...puking....high sugar foods..puking. There were times if I ate something in the car on my way home and it didn't sit right I would end up puking in my front yard because I couldn't make it inside quick enough. At restaurants I would search out the bathroom incase I needed to puke..it happened a few times. I dreaded eating out because of this. My family soon could tell when something wouldn't sit right. The physical signs that started before the upheaval of the food I just ingested. I now hate Dairy Queen, Mcdonald's, Burger King, KFC. At a year post op I don't even miss that food and it feels good to say I don't eat there. I continued with my post op appointments at The Garratt Wellness Centre with my dietician. I was doing everything right. I learned what I could and could not eat very quickly, but with a food addiction limits were still tested. The weightloss started to slow down so in October I decided I need to incorporate an active liftsyle along with my new "diet plan". I got a gym memebership and set some physical goals. I wanted to run 5K. Now anyone that knows me, knows that I am allergic to physical activity!! I hated PE in school, I hated exercise, found it such a chore but when the scale slowed down that scared the shit outta me and I knew I couldn't just rely on my tool. I needed to do the work on my end as well. I ended up getting a family membership at the YMCA. I dowloaded a C25K app on my iPhone and away I went. It took me longer then the app suggested but any weeks I found hard I would repeat until I got it down pat, then moved on to the next week. I started running, yoga, weigh training and joining some of the classes.
After the 114lb weightloss I started to feel "normal". People didn't stare, my anxiety was gone, I felt good about myself. I started getting male attention.....even from my patients at work! A patient told me he would like to see me naked on Wreck Beach. I had no idea how to handle that other then an awkward giggle. This is something I'm still try to navigate. Fashion!!! Which I hated before because I could only shop at stores that catered to the obese population, became something I enjoyed. My first time walking into a "normal" store was so overwhelming. I could fit into anything on the shelves and I wanted it ALL!! So I loaded my arms up with clothes and had a grand time trying stuff on and actually liking the way it fit! New scrubs, new pants, new shirts, bras, underwear....all of it had to be replaced as I shrunk. Some things I didn't even get the chance to wear.
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